Money's Too Tight to Mention
by TheYmp
Summary: SPN100 Challenge: tight. Three drabbles where the Winchesters are struggling with money problems. #1: Just the essentials. 100 words. #2: Some things are just a step too far. 150 words. #3: You better work it. Sashay, shantay. 200 words.


**Disclaimer: I don't own ****_Supernatural_**** or its characters - these were created by Eric Kripke - I'm just borrowing them. I'm not making any commercial gain. No harm or infringement intended.**

**SPN100 Challenge: tight. Three drabbles where the Winchesters are struggling with money problems. #1: Just the essentials. 100 words. #2: Some things are just a step too far. 150 words. #3: You better work it. Sashay, shantay. 200 words.**

~#~

**Money's Too Tight to Mention**

~#~

**A/N: ****_Just the essentials_****. 100 words.**

**Bare Necessities**

**_"The bare necessities of life will come to you" – 'The Jungle Book'_**

Sam frowned at the sight of Dean laden down with heavy grocery bags. Only that morning they'd talked about the need to tighten their belts due to their precarious financial situation.

"So... did you manage to scam a new credit card?"

"This ain't the nineties," scoffed Dean. "Damn _Patriot Act_."

"Well, did you hustle someone at pool then?"

Nah," tutted Dean. "Never on our own doorstep."

"So what have you got there?" asked Sam, barely able to conceal his irritation.

"Just the bare necessities..." said Dean, unpacking his purchases.

"_Just_ beer?" sighed Sam.

Dean rolled his eyes. "And whisky too!"

~#~

**A/N: ****_Some things are just a step too far_****. 150 words.**

**The Family None-of-your-business**

**_"We don't need no money we can make it all work", 'Blue Jeans', Lana Del Ray_**

Passing by Dean's room, Sam stopped at the sound of agonized groaning.

"I _knew_ his injuries were worse than he was letting on," he muttered to himself. He hammered on the door after trying it and finding it locked. "Let me in!"

"No, go away," came his brother's faint cry.

Further sounds of anguish from within had Sam shouldering open the door with a loud, splintering crash, unmindful of the bruising he was sure he'd now be sporting tomorrow.

Dean stood frozen, motionless like a rabbit in headlights, caught in the midst of his struggle to button up his jeans.

"Yeah, they're _way _too tight," chuckled Sam after recovering his composure.

"But they're my best jeans," complained Dean. "Only a couple of rips and I'm sure this stain is just BBQ sauce..."

"Dude, I'm taking you shopping tomorrow. No arguments."

Dean groaned; there were some hunts even he couldn't stomach.

~#~

**A/N: ****_You better work it. Sashay, shantay_****. 200 words.**

**Sweating the Assets**

**_"They were delighted and agreed to give him money" - Luke 22:5_**

"I know things are tight," said Dean, "but I really need another pair of jeans, these are more holes than denim."

"I've got the solution to all our financial problems," replied Sam, proudly waving in a dramatic gesture towards his laptop.

Dean sat down beside him and squinted at the open webpage suspiciously. "_Porn?_"

"No, jeez," frowned Sam. "Not _everything_ has to be about sex."

"Hey, if you say so," scoffed Dean.

"This is _Patreön,"_ said Sam, bravely soldiering on. "The public pay us money and we reward them with details about some of our cases."

"I don't know," said Dean cautiously. "We've always kept that kinda thing on the down low. I'm not sure telling folks what's out there is such a great idea."

Sam sighed. "You're probably right."

Dean slapped Sam on the shoulder and stood up. His motion was accompanied but a loud ripping sound from the seat of his pants.

"You know, you _were_ right... _earlier_... so, maybe just a few photos?" chuckled Sam.

"Above the waist?" sighed Dean.

"That's not the money shot," said Sam pulling an apologetic face.

"Sammy, are you telling me I've got a nice ass?"

"Well, everyone's got _one_ redeeming feature."

_**A/N: I've had to deliberately misspell "Patreön" as otherwise the word is automatically removed by the FF saving process!**_

(;,;)


End file.
